It's fine so long as they are your former not current teacher. Teachers aren't allowed to date students because it's an issue with favoritism, professionalism and power balance. Its the same reason doctors, nurses and psychiatrists can't date their patients. I knew someone who date their teacher as soon as she wasn't his student anymore although he was 25 and she was TBH the age gap with you seems a bit large but I don't think it's wrong though I can see why someone might be concerned he is exploiting you not saying I think he is just that your family might.
DS when i was 16 i thought it was ok to hug my teacher but he told me its wrong so i knew then no to to be his gf. Probably because it could lead to an unfair advantage for the student. It is also very unprofessional.
Students dating lecturers: Why, how, and what are the consequences? - Study International
Since you graduated I see no problem with it now. The reason you are probably getting stares is the massive age gap, if I had to take a guess. It's also possible most people might view you as some kind of gold digger or something like that. Since in the case of age gaps society tends to view money as the cause for marriage and not love. Yes, like Legion said, the primary problem with a student dating a teacher is that the teacher is in a position of authority and has a duty of care for students. In a relationship both parties should be equal, so starting from a point where one person is "in charge" can either negatively impact either the teaching environment if the student can't accept the authority of the teacher where the teacher is supposed to be in charge or the relationship environment if the student gives the teacher authority in the partnership.
Additionally authority can be abused especially in the situation where you are dealing with a young person who is not an adult and the student can be "groomed" or "coerced" into being in or even desiring a relationship with the teacher. There is also the matter of bias in grading a student's performance.
Should teachers date students?
A large age gap in particular where one person has only just reached adulthood can also be problematic. You've just come from being taken care of as a child by your parents and you shouldn't expect or want your life with your partner to be the same - being taken care of as a child. He's going to be far more experienced in matters of day to day life and in many cases, it makes sense that he would be able to make the wiser decision.
This can be problematic as it may make it difficult for you to learn these things on your own and he may be unwilling to allow you to make decisions due to your inexperience. It may also be difficult for you to determine whether he's making a decision because it's an intelligent one or making a decision because it's what he prefers even though you should both have an equal say.
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Once again this comes back to the problem of one person being "in charge of the relationship" which isn't healthy. Additionally the fact that two people in very distinct age brackets are at different life stages and may want to accomplish different things which can strain on a relationship. From what you've written it does come across like you have a problem by letting him be in control and putting his needs before your own though particularly in cases where he makes you uncomfortable and antagonises your family and a friends.
To be honest, it's a very grey issue with solid arguments from both sides of the spectrum.
However, I fully understand there are also teachers who can fall in love with a student and just want a genuine relationship, and vice versa. It's a difficult subject. Since you're now 19 and left school, there is obviously no longer any issue what so ever. However, if you were dating while you were still in school, and he had that influence over you I dunno, as I said it's a grey issue worthy of further contemplation.
The real problem is, it can be easily exploited by devious people. It's not rocket science that a person dating someone he's got authority over is frowned upon seeing the history of that.
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The age gap is something people will care about and if that's pure society or if biology comes into it is a discussion for another time. However the biological bias there is that parents lose fertility with age as a security that they will be able to take care of their offspring until it grows up. Not really an issue these days since most manage to get into their 70's anyway. The thing is people are going to stare, people are going to think you're a gold digger or that he's a cradle robber because if we can't judge strangers we don't know, what else are we going to do?
Who could even consider such a thing? As a general rule, getting married just out of high school isn't a great idea, though that's not to say it never works. Yeah I agree, sounds like he has an exhibition fetish at the least, which he shouldn't force on you if you're not into that. He shouldn't be disrespecting your parents or making you uncomfortable if you don't want him to. That's not how partnerships work, you need to be equals in a marriage.
You aren't a trophy and you shouldn't be treated like one. You being his wife gives him no right to humiliate you, and if he says otherwise he's full of shit. You need to tell him to stop if he's doing something like that and you don't like it, and he needs to listen. Yeah, I am honestly surprised by the relatively warm reception this is getting.
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- Dating Your TA: Yay Or Nay? – NYU Local.
OP, I mean no offense, but this sounds like a really bad situation. You met him when you were a teenager in a period where he was an authority figure over you. You'd known him for two years before you got married, during which you couldn't be the least bit romantically involved because he was teaching. Getting married to someone you've only known for two years is a pretty big deal and I'd automatically be a little questional about the decision regardless of extraneous factors.
Given the complexity of this relationship and how young you are just sets off all kinds of warning signs. Not even to mention the strange thrill that he seems to be getting from feeling up his teenage wife in front of her family and strangers. I have a friend who was in a similar situation, although it started when she was a bit younger than you were when you met this guy.
She dated a guy in his mid 30s for a couple years, and while she thought it was perfectly fine for a while, she felt horribly manipulated and violated after. According to the stepmother, who also asked not to be named, Zamora began grooming her pupil using a classroom group chat. Zamora was taken into custody hours after the boy's parents reported the relationship to the school principal on March She was just using him for her own grotesque benefits.
It's a year-old child who got taken advantage by a monster. I want her to spend the rest of her life in prison. The boy's parents recently claimed Zamora's husband Daniel called them and begged them not to report his wife to police after they saw her sexual texts, saying she had made a mistake. A second student later came forward to police saying he had witnessed Zamora having sex with the year-old and admitted to receiving naked photos from the woman as well. The parents of the alleged victim told police that Zamora's husband 'harassed' the father over the phone, begging him not to go to the authorities and insisting that his wife had 'made a big mistake, but that she loved the kids,' according to the documents.
Daniel Zamora also allegedly suggested that he and the boy's dad 'meet up' and 'settle this,' but the parent turned down his offer and hung up on him. Zamora and her husband, who she has known she was 16, married in They don't have any children. So, it was only appropriate to ask Brittany [to marry me] while falling; a. Friday, Jan 18th 5-Day Forecast. Share this article Share. Daniel and Brittany's Skydiving Proposal Court records: Goodyear teacher sent naked pictures to two students 'Brittany Zamora is a monster. Goodyear teacher was 'dating' a student before her arrest. Share or comment on this article: Students warned about Arizona teacher 'dating' boy weeks before arrest e-mail Bing Site Web Enter search term: An in-house gym, Westlife wall, vast Buddha and a sprawling wardrobe Barrister pulled Duke of Edinburgh, 97, from wreckage Boris says Brexit can unite the country, as he makes a dramatic pitch for the Tory leadership by saying Top UK hedge fund manager warns: From two nose jobs, three abortions and a bankruptcy, these five women decided not to drop their bombshells Three 'vigilantes lured neighbour to flat, stabbed him times then pulled out his fingernails in brutal Passenger who saw boyfriend, 25, crush boy, three, by Ten fascinating facts that could save your life - including what to do if you're caught in a rip I fell in love with a conman Stalker's chilling warning to terrified woman during nine-hour kidnap and rape Rescuers call in the excavators as they prepare to dig two tunnels in bid to save boy, two, who fell down But what about TAs?
They walk the fine line between equal and superior. And they too are usually intelligent, accomplished, published, and passionate.
Students dating lecturers: Why, how, and what are the consequences?
We experience our TAs in a much more relaxed, casual setting. All of this makes them much more likely candidates for dating and relationships. Section VIII on consensual relationships states:. We spoke with Craig Jolley, the Deputy Director for the Office of Equal Opportunity, who often deals with issues relating to discrimination and sexual harassment in the academic environment. In these situations, the NYU administration has the right and responsibility to intervene, although there is no defined method of dealing with inappropriate relationships.
All three students discussed their experiences under the condition of anonymity.